WHO do you really want to blame???

I was in one of my favorite stores yesterday...waiting in line to buy groceries for din-din, and couldn't help overhearing the conversation between one of the cashiers and a customer. As soon as I heard the words "my dog" my ears perked up...Like any predator, my sense of hearing improved once I acknowledged my "prey" - so to speak... 

I guess the customer was buying lots of doggy treats, because the cashier commented about her own dog, and that she loved her dog etc... but that she (the dog) was "naughty" and in the "dog house".... Yes, this is what caught my attention, blaming the dog for something the human probably did in the first place to set the dog up for "failure"... 

From what I heard, and trust me, I didn't listen very long... once I heard the blame-game I shut my ears and diverted to the luscious chocolate display next to me...plus, I saw a friend there, who happens to be a former student of both my private and Manners class. Anyway, she arrived at the perfect time. We started chatting away, which was a great diversion for me. 

What was being said you ask? I guess the cashier and her boyfriend left a pile of food out on the counter at their home... including a pizza... Well, counter-surfing is a grande game to be played by any animal, especially dogs (and husbands when freshly baked cookies are sitting out)... Not only can dogs jump up on counters easily - or stretch and put their paws up...they're also quite efficient at using their mouths and paws, pulling items onto the floor to be devoured. Especially when the said item is a freakin' pizza!!! YUM! What a HUGE payoff!!! 

So, come on!! Really? Blame the dog? Really? Hmm... I myself applaud the dog for being so resourceful and clever, and for hopefully teaching those humans a lesson about "puppy proofing" their home... I say put the humans in the dog house for being naughty... Oh, and by the way, as much as I hate to admit it, being the professional that I am, it's happened to me too! Yep, me, the one who teaches everyone else about dogs... My own dog Poncho taught my husband and myself about puppy proofing out home! Let's just say we're much more careful about where we leave food, especially when we're preoccupied with each other :-) These animals learned!

Defining a subjective term.

I hear the words quite often...But what do they all mean? What exactly is being described? What is the message being sent? It's difficult for me, the dog trainer that comes from the "academic" "science-based" philosophy camp, to judge or determine why a dog is doing what they're doing based on these subjective terms that owners share with me. What words am  I speaking of? Allow me to share: 

• My dog is being dominant.
• My dog is being alpha.
• My dog is being controlling. 
• My dog is being aggressive.
• My dog has learned to be submissive with me. 

First off, let's see what some of the true definitions are, shall we?

• Dominant: commanding, controlling, or prevailing over all others.
• Alpha: something that is first.
• Controlling: inclined to control others' behavior : domineering.
• Aggressive: tending toward or exhibiting aggression. 
• Aggression: a forceful action or procedure (as an unprovoked attack) especially when intended to dominate or master
• Submissive (submission): to yield oneself to the authority or will of another

Wow. I find all of these terms pretty interesting - and confusing, and frankly quite negative in describing a loved one, including our pets. I think we all understand what they mean, and how they would pertain to describing another human. But describing our dogs? Really? Okay, I'll give you "aggression". That one I've used myself when describing dogs that would fit into my Feisty Fido class - one with dog-dog issues, or dog-stranger issues. But even a word like "aggression" can be very subjective. What's "aggressive" to one person, might not fit that same picture to another. Geez, you should see me on the road sometimes, I can be pretty "aggressive" ;-) I've been known to bark more than my own dog Poncho... at times. 

As for these catchy and popular terms... well, humans can use them all they want to describe their dogs behavior... but what it comes down to, and what I will ask right outta the gate when working with clients is, "what is your dog doing? Paint me a picture." Why? A few reasons are: 

1. Subjective terms don't tell me anything substantial to correctly evaluate a situation. 
2. The descriptions could be more about an owners own frustrations with their dogs behavior, vs the actual behavior of their dog. 
3. Acts of "dominance" to one person could mean something completely different to someone else. 
4. There is no exact scientific measure, standard protocol etc... of these descriptive terms. 

What are dogs really doing when people use the above descriptive terms? Is your dog bolting out the door before you? Uh, hello? Is that being "dominant" or are they just being a bit more impulsive? After all, they are dogs, right? Impulse control is usually not in their behavior repertoire. How about jumping up to greet when you get home? Is this "aggression" or just the normal greeting behavior or dogs? I believe the latter. As for "submission", well, I ask you what the underlying motivation is there when animals "submit" to us humans. Usually "fear". They don't want to "get in trouble" (yikes, dare I use this phrase...) so they provide their innate body language of "I'm no threat to you." 

Regardless if you use these terms or not, it's probably more important to pay attention to what your dog is doing and not try to figure out what they're thinking... I'm not clairvoyant, but I'm a good history taker and can observe your dogs behavior, the details, triggers, and of course how and or why a behavior is being reinforced - by you and/or the environment. Which brings me to this important question for you to take with you today: if you think your dog is controlling you, what are YOU doing that is reinforcing the behaviors you don't like? Ouch, there's the word of the day: "accountability". 

No gel for this dog!

Let's face it, if dogs were out in the wild, doing all their doggy things in their doggy world, calling their "hair-dresser" would not be on their "to do" list. HOWEVER, since they do live in our human world, "bath time" is indeed something that does becomes part of their routine - for some more often than others.

You've heard me say that many times we (us and our dogs) learn the same way. We enjoy similar things and situations, some things and situations more than others. Well, we're really not that much different!  This is a little list I came up with regarding "grooming" for humans:

• Soaking in a hot tub...(many reasons we enjoy that) while making the tub experience fun: rubber duckies, boats, and SO many other toys...not just for kids, right? Bubble bath... hello? I had Mr. Bubble as a kid...too much fun!
• Candles and/or other types of mood lighting
• Aromatherapy including oils and/or incense to help stimulate the senses
• "Spa Day"
• Pedicures, manicures, etc... 
• Hair salons...and going every few months, right? 

So why should we make bathing and grooming any less fun for our pets than we do for ourselves? I know I have it easy compared to others... I have Poncho a small, single-coated dog that is very food and toy motivated. But, that doesn't mean you can't make bathing and grooming any less fun and rewarding for your own dog. Remember, just by pairing the event with something your dog already likes will teach your dog to like that event... Which brings me to the video below. 

Note: sorry about the poor video-camera action - it's difficult to dry Poncho with one hand. I would normally use my other hand to towel him or rub his fur to help dry it more quickly... but I had to play "videographer" too :-) The tripod should be delivered next week ;-) 

If you don't groom your own dog, and you have someone else doing it for you, you might want to ask the person what steps they take to make it more "fun" for your dog...Who knows, they might make it so great you'll want to switch hair-dressers too :-)